Taking liberties

I don't know how many people saw this article the other week. I know this old news now but I've been a busy boy!

Families of two persons incarcerated by the fellows over at GMP are suing them over this:

You see, despite all the media coverage of the trial and verdicts, apparently it is one step too far for the families to allow GMP to show mock ups of what these two would look like when they are finally released from prison. Never mind the rights of all their victims, it is a breach of their human rights now that GMP have put up a poster to remind those on the edge of violence there can be long term consequences.

Liberty are supporting this. I think I personally would have a lot more time for listening to Liberty if I was hearing reports from Tehran or Saudi Arabia, somewhere there is a real need for someone to be outspoken and brave on human rights issues, not living a comfortable barely threatened existance with quasi-celebrity appearances on Have I got News For You.

I agree there is a need to keep an eye out on these kind of issues here. But I think there needs to be some kind of acknowledgement too about how actually we do do some things better over here. Perhaps there is, but I've never heard it. Even go to mainland Europe and find yourself in the slammer, you'll be hoping you can afford to pay for your own interpreters and legal fees. And there's no 24 hour limit in police custody over in Italy, I can tell you.

As for the efforts to sue GMP over this poster, I do hope it falls flat on its face. There was wide coverage on local and national media, with the faces of those two plastered all over, but no protestations from Liberty then.

However, GMP are seen as an easy target. At least that what it seems like.

Prisoners, Property and Water

Just when you thought the dust was settling, the Met have managed another media headline spectacular. Waterboarding suspects? Handily, the Times point out, in case you were confused with the other Metropolitan Police in the UK, this is London's Metropolitan Police.

There are two branches of this story, one of which I sadly don't find surprising, the other I find incredulous.

Apparently, this all started with an Enfield drugs bust, and it sounded like a good one, with three in the bin for drug importation. Probably even got a mention in the local rag or the Mets inhouse propoganda journal, the cannily titled "The job". However, thats as good as the story gets.

Clearly, something has gone wrong from then on. The DPS, an alternative acronym for PSD, whichever combination of Standards, Professional and Directorate you care for- the Police police, have got whiff of something rotten.

I think I have a degree of understanding for the officers who felt it not fair that an apparent thoroughly illegal lifestyle of drug importation should result in expensive electro gadget refinery and thought of better places for them. After all, the Proceeds of Crime Act does takes a lot of time and hassle through the courts and this was more effective and satisfying.

However, summary justice like that is only ever going to bring you trouble. There's an old mantra that has been ignored- the three Ps that can get you fired- Prisoners, Prostitutes and Property. As unfair as it seems that the criminal element wallow in bling, theft is theft however Robin Hood esque your motives, especially when you're supposed to be the impartial sheriff.

That side of the story I don't find unbelievable, and reading in one article or the other if the DPS were at the covert surveillance stage then this was not the first time this particular band of 7 pound note cops had had a crafty property bonus and frankly had it coming.

But this waterboarding thing is so far out of left field that I honestly don't think I can accept it as true for the sake of my own professional pride of wearing a uniform saying "Police", however remote and distant Enfield is. The cynic in me reads articles about how difficult it is to prove it took place and equates it to being equally difficult to disprove. The state of the Met as it is today post G20 some commentators will never be shook in their opinion that it took place regardless what any investigation, inquiry or jury may say.

For such an event to have taken place the amount of collaboration going on between so many officers is disturbingly huge. It can only have taken place at the place of arrest as there is simply no way on earth anyone would do such a thing at any custody suite, every angle covered as it is in audio and visual cameras, with any random officer coming in or out to ask the exasperated custody sergeant some banal question.

I just hope this allegation turns out to be somehow irrevocably disproved. If the opposite, then frankly I hang my head in associated shame.

Note - 11th July- I read today in the Metro that the suspects are now claiming compensation- why am I not surprised in the least. Furthermore, apparently the torture allegations involve the schoolyard bullying tactic of flushing head down toilet bowls. Bullying, unpleasant, and utterly unprofessional yes, but waterboarding? No. Yet the media still went with the waterboarding headlines. Why?

Nothing much doing....

Ok so a bit of a lack of inspiration to pen anything of particular controversy of late. I've been let out of custody a bit the last couple of weeks and it has been such a refreshing change I haven't even minded standing on a crime scene- I kid you not.

It was bonkers busy when I did get out the other day- a near fatal road accident which we didn't know about until he turned up barely alive in a taxi at the local hospital; a student who said a smart comment to a group of people who were less inclined to settle disagreements by use of constructive debate; a chap who thought his argumentative co-passenger should be silenced by use of a bottle through the trachea.

My one was the middle one. What a pasting he got. How he was still able to stand I'll never know. He looked like he was growing golf balls in his head such were the size of the bruises. He was almost something out of a zombie movie, slurry mumbly speech, shuffling along missing a shoe, bleeding misshapen head and torn up shirt. I have got to admit though I did have a little less sympathy for him as he clearly didn't get the hint that smart sarcastic comments or to be more accurate, insults- don't win you friends, not even from the people trying to help you. The ambulance crew were sorely tempted to leave him by the roadside.

Tell you what our job can be fairly tedious on a weekend night duty but I'd still rather do mine than the ambulance boys and girls. The amount of abuse they must get. At least we do carry handcuffs and have a number of powers to deal with abusive drunken (insert your own adjective here) whatnots. Granted the consequences rarely amounts to much, maybe a night in the cells and a £80 fine when you're kicked out, but at least there is a degree of self satisfaction in slamming the cell door to the insults and waving bye bye through the wicket. Ambulance crews don't get that.

On a different note- we have another Home Secretary? 4th one in 4 years? I can't even remember this new blokes name. I wonder what harebrained idea is going to come spouting forth in what has to be the Labour Party's desperate last stand.

Whingeworthiness

Something that I think will be the case in any police force ("service") across the country is our outstanding ability to moan.

No matter where you are, ask a room full of coppers about what is wrong with their particular employer and/or the role they are currently doing and you will be met with a cacophony of wails, whinges, a wall of swear words and a general environment of grump.

I don't know whether it is I have finally managed to have two undisturbed days off or whether there were was a particularly special mix of additives and chemicals in the chinese we had this evening but I figured there must be some good stuff going on somewhere. Senior types would call this identifying good practice but I think I just felt swimming against the general flow of police blogger malaise for once.

I think what makes the whole police system "work" overall is the people on the front line - and not necessarily old bill- who are dedicated and work around the tape and frustrations. The station I used to work was one of the few left that had a garage hand, whose general job was to look after the fleet.

This bloke was absolutely worth his weight in gold. You'd come in to write a report or have grub or whatever. He'd come and hunt you down, and have your keys off you. When you came back, your car would be sparkling. It'd be vacuumed. Mechanical checks had been done. He was trusted implicitly by all the teams- nobody doubted him when he said something was wrong with a car. He'd sort out all the boot equipment and had fully stocked first aid kits waiting in standby for you to swap if you had to use yours.

All the teams bought him real good stuff for christmas- full meals at decent restaurants for his whole family, flight tickets- not a box of highland shortbreads in sight!

When I moved divisions, I was shocked to find the state of the fleet when there wasn't someone as dedicated as him looking after it. I am still trying to think of ways I can persuade him to move...

There must be some others around who can dredge up a tale where something works right in this otherwise over-politicised, top heavy bonkers system that is 21st Century British policing....

Irrelevant time

It is often with a sense of concealed ironic amusement I book someone in, and the officer tells me his 'Socpa' reason for arrest is for a prompt and effective investigation.

If only. The only thing prompt about anyone in custody is the hurry of all the various squads to think of reasons why it wouldn't be in their remit. The battles I have had with the burglary squad who will stop at nothing to argue that someone who has been arrested for burglary and booked in for burglary has not actually committed burglary before they've even read the officers notes or interviewed the bloke.

I have had it argued that someone who gained access to a roof to steal lead, via someone letting him in through a communal entrance, is not burglary. He entered the building by consent you see, and therefore could not be a trespasser.

Or, how I once caught someone, still inside a flat, having smashed the door in. I was literally on top of this call when it came out and was inside and grabbed him (I'm not sure who was more surprised to see each other) before he had moved anything outside. That wasn't burglary, according to the burglary squad, because he had only committed criminal damage and we couldn't prove the intention to steal!

That last one was the only time I've ever lost my temper at work- with the DC who was trying to tell me I should deal with this prisoner as criminal damage.

The bunfights that go on about who should deal with a prisoner can go on for hours. Meanwhile of course Chummy is sat twiddling his thumbs in the cell whilst clock ticks slowly down. My job as the custody sergeant is to make sure he is dealt with promptly and the entries on some custody logs are simply a procession of calls by me to the various gatekeepers (i.e. those who decide whose unit should deal with what prisoner) haranguing them for someone to come down and actually get on with it.

Of course, prior to any of the specialist squads actually taking a prisoner on the Response jockeys have to do an ever increasing list of minimum requirements before they'll accept the handover- i.e. statements from witnesses, victims, photos, seizure and evidencing. Basically, they're only happy if the only thing they have to do is interview.

It's odd. Every so often we get a really juicy prisoner which one of the super central based squads come out and deal with- the murderers, shootings type prisoners. The contrast is stark compared to our local suit department- they offer to help the response team boys with exhibiting stuff, even volunteer to take statements from witnesses. Meanwhile, just getting our local CID out of their office I normally consider to be an achievement....

Not a good week for the Chiefs

Oh dear. It hasn't been a good week for those higher up the food chain.

Commander Dizaei is off to face Westminster Magistrates.

A Chief Inspector Jones is looking like he's in a great deal of bother.

Meanwhile double trouble in Surrey as both the Chief Super and Superintendent are on gardening leave.

The thing which got me about these three reports is that I have no doubt that each individual is stressing their innocence. Each one is hoping that the criminal justice system is come to the right conclusion. Yet there is a distinctly different tone between one of these reports and the other two.

The fact that Commander Dizaei is president of the NBPA is neither here nor there in relation to the allegations he has been charged with. Yet the NBPA are mentioned no less than 5 times. The Metropolitan Police Authority call on the Met to ensure that he has all necessary support in place and reminds them they have a duty of care to him.

Where was this sentiment at G20? Why does Commander Dizaei get such overt support from the MPA? I understand the TSG sergeant involved in the G20 allegations (i.e. not charged) is a black officer. Where was the NBPA there offering its full support then?

Feel free to try and explain this to me.....!

Highway to.....

Now that the weather has warmed up a bit, I'm getting to really enjoy the rides home on the bike now.

I've been doing some completely daft hours for a while now (not exactly by choice, I might add) which means quite often when I'm either going to or from - or on a really bad day, both- I'm the only soul on the road.

After a long, frustrating, sweaty day I find myself really looking forward to the ride home. There's the familiarity of the bike, and the fact it does exactly what I tell it to do. It it isn't ordered what to do and doesn't ignore criminality for the sake of public opinion. Our senior management are so paranoid in the post G20 climate that in a potential public order situation we have to be facing virtual armageddon before we are actually told to go and deal with something, even when it is blatantly and clearly illegal.

I'd dearly love to divulge more but I can't for the usual reasons.

So yes after a sweaty day I find myself looking forward to the ride, the familiar v-twin thump and buzz through the footpegs, the cool night air rushing through the flip top. I don't scream home, just pootle along, having some wind down time.

I note with irony the recent media hoohah about overtime payments. Already, my neighbours are giving me wry looks when I talk about the most recent debacle of a 16 hour day. Thing is, I'm not interested in the money. Overtime is for young single people, or those who aren't young but want to be single. I have a family and I'd much rather spend time with them. I'm fed up of being told about the latest first thing the little one has done by text message, or watching a video of it when I get home.

I'm earning nowhere £52k! That sergeant clearly didn't have a day off in a year. Crazy fool.

The politician's policeman

If I was a policeman who policed in the way the government do, not as the government say:

I'd work in County A. I'd live in County B, but of course that'd mean I'd have my proper home as my second home, so I can buy some decent furniture, paint, televisions etc etc...
I'd then suggest paying myself to turn up to work in County A, on top of my salary.
I'd only speak to members of the public on a once weekly basis, and then spend the rest of my time speaking to my colleagues about what I think is best for the public, in a grand building the public can't visit the most part of.
I'd vote myself a pay rise every year.
I'd claim charity giving, gardening, cat food and christmas decorations on expenses.
I'd vote myself a bigger summer holiday.

All the while, I'd orate at great length...

"The issue of accountability. This is vital for public confidence"
"People pay taxes and want to know their money is making a difference"
"As a government, we have always been clear that the rights we exercise as individuals must be balanced against the responsibilities towards others"

All the above direct quotes from Hazel Blears, January 2005.

Va va vroom

Happened upon this in the Telegraph Motoring section the other day. Despite all the Subara WRX's, Evo 9's etc floating around in various forces, check out the one they used to showcase the British Police.

It's a comparison between in-service police cars across the world.

The German entrant- a 225mph Brabus V12



The Italian- Lamborghini Gallardo.....


The Austrians have a fairly tame (in this company!) 911



The Americans have some custom made beast with integrated shotgun mounts


And holding up the union jack proudly......

Briefly back on G20..........

A quick youtube special of one of the lesser publicised G20 events

Good things come in fours

Here's the scenario.


You're outside the Stupid Simian nightclub, a local pit deemed apparently glamourous enough that the local D-list celebs haunt it.

It's just you and one other unit there, as everyone else is miles away dealing with a 20 man brawl the CCTV picked up.

One bloke is sat against the wall, pretty much incoherent, bleeding from his head. Nobody knows what happened to him. Two other drunken pests bleeding from their noses are haranguing you, jabbing at the bouncer the size of a small bungalow. The bouncer has a face of thunder and has a corking black eye coming up.

A girl is wailing and demanding an ambulance.


Someone else now bursts out from the club, pursued by another of the door staff. He is wearing a skintight top and there is no way his muscular state was achieved without a little steroidical help.

You manage to figure out that there is now someone out cold in the club, and steroid boy is responsible. He is now standing in the street with that look in the eye that you know means he is just willing you to dare try handcuffing him.

So here's the question. What would you do? What has priority? And then, do you think the office inquisition the following morning would support or criticise you?

Unnewsworthy

Another grim weekend in the Met.

Not that you'd know it.

If you search hard enough in the news websites, you might be lucky to find out news that another CO19 officer is critical after injuries in the line of duty, and that a traffic cop was killed after leaving work.

There's coverage of how the chief is off sick with appendicitus. Just how pathetic is celebrity culture now that a 'known' face gets front page BBC london website coverage for being ill, but the life threatening injuries of an officer doesn't get a mention.

Chocolate and Hugs

More musings on riot policing.

I just want people to imagine for a second what it would be like to be a public order (riot) officer, using the G20 circumstances.

You know that a number of your colleagues have been injured. The persons responsible have simply melted away back into the crowd. You know that somewhere in the crowd in front of you is a person wishing to seriously injure you, but you have no idea what they look like and you know they will give you no warning when they try to.

Exactly how do you feel? How do you interact with the people coming near you?

I see Mr new Commisioner whatsisname has ordered a review into public order tactics. Well part of me is glad of that. The public order training I've had is heavily geared towards full riots, poll tax style. There doesn't seem to be an inbetween option, so if this review can come up with something then maybe it'll be for the good. I've heard various ideas from the troops as to what the end result might be though. The consensus from the ground is that we should offer hot chocolate and hugs in future disorder situations.

On a more realistic note I reckon it's time to introduce (like everyone else in Europe) water cannon. It's more image friendly- no headline pictures of sticks swinging and blooded people- and appears to be quite effective. I have no idea why we don't have it. I think it's because of top level paranoia that we don't want to appear too militaristic. But to me it seems a lesser use of force- one bowser with a fire hose versus a line of 16 ugly mugs wielding batons.

I wonder what will happen with those two TSG guys. Not that there was ever a place for getting away with anything but in modern times any place in public with near every person with a video recording phone do something out of line, you know it is near inevitable someone will have recorded it, and won't be saying no to a nice sum from a newspaper or two.

I've done a couple of things public ordery since G20 and the level of paranoia from top brass is laughable. Actually, from some. On one of them the briefing was by a Chief Inspector with all the charisma of a flannel, and said all the right buzzwords, and took extra time to remind us about the current political situation.

A second Chief Inspector on another day was clearly less career minded and was more forthright in his instuction. He reminded us that was never a problem in the use of force on two conditions, namely that it was justified and recorded (in some kind of notes). There may have been a colourful adjective or two inserted.....

Sides

The G20 trial by media rumbles on.

Now this may well be an embarrassing fact for a police officer to admit but I don't mind reading the Guardian. I have even been known to actually part with my own money for it.


Well, probably not any more. Someone on their editorial team is so cock-a-hoop that someone sent them the Ian Tomlinson video that they've taken it on themselves to crusade against this tide of police brutality.


I normally read the Guardian because more often than not they seem to have a balanced reporting, and seem to at least acknowledge there are two sides to an issue. I was very interested in their magazine article about two polar opposite approaches on dealing with London's "disaffected" (insert your own adjective here) youth.


However, their G20 coverage, particularly last Saturday's edition which is the last one I looked at- is all about the police brutality. Rent-a-quote people are popping up everywhere saying how the police were sooo nasty and shouted at them and some people even got a baton.


Now don't get me wrong, if there are occasions when we step over the line then yes it needs to be investigated. But where in the Guardian is the acknowledgement of the issues we faced? The dangerous violent minority, who hospitalised officers (where are the pictures of slumped officers being carried away by colleagues? The officer- not in riot gear- who collected a some kind of pole round the head?) and then melted back into anonymity in the crowd?


I wasn't involved directly at the scene, I was effectively on standby off normal duties at my own nick in case we were called in. Very bored I was. On the Wednesday, I was watching the news in the evening with the wife, when the images came on of the crowd surging against the line of officers, helmets being knocked off heads, little digs and pokes going in.

She looked at me, knowing I was on standby for the next day, and although she wouldn't say anything, I knew she was worried.

Still, it isn't as newsworthy or as an interesting anti-police crusade to bother thinking about the personal aspect of this from the other side of the thin blue line. Hundreds of rent-a-quotes from the innocents but not even a token effort to consider things from the other side.

I suppose thats what prompted me into thinking perhaps I ought to get this blogging lark resurrected. I actually started writing this on Sunday but it has taken me till today to actually finish it because I have spent a barking amount of time at work this week, including the most spectacular waste of a day ever yesterday on Operation Completely Unnecssary Total Overkill, more of which another day.

Okay.........

So yes this has been somewhat neglected, I know.

There are two reasons for this. Firstly, the worlds most terrible shift pattern I am still stuck on, which generally means time I spend not at work I really don't want to spend thinking about work.
The second is small, has a heck of a set of lungs, is gaining weight at a very healthy rate, and thoroughly does not believe in lie ins!

Still, there is light at the end of the tunnel as far as the first one goes. I am finally in a position where I am able to apply to go somewhere else, so that is what I am doing. I have been doing response team for a number of years now and it is time to test the waters somewhere else.

So maybe, if things work out right, should get the time and inclination to get something back going on here. Still plenty going on in medialand that winds me up, like the major criticism of the overbearing G20 policing yet the 300 arrests, tear gas and charges going on in France barely gets a mention.

So give me a bit of time, a slightly more regular sleeping ability (that'll be a couple of months yet methinks!) and hopefully will get this old dusty blog a bit more sparkly again.

On route to violence

PC (Ex-PCSO, not WPC) Bloggs has sent me an email questioning the emotions that go through your head en route to a violent shout. I was going to send an email reply but I'd thought I'd share it with the world.

A word of warning though- in doing so I am breaking two of my rules of blogging- i.e. don't post after a shandy or two, and don't blog when you've been awake over 20 hours. Oh well. So forgive me if this goes a little sideways here and there.

And now, right on cue, Scrappycat (one of two small beasties I own that treat the Simon residence as a hotel) has decided to lie down right in front of the screen, so I'm having to crane my head one way then the other to see what I've written.

Anyhoo in response to the question. In the manner of a true politician I'd have to ask what kind of "violent" shout it is. Usually, the response is apathy. More often than not, a call which comes out as depicting violence is nothing of the sort by the time we get there. Blue lights and sirens invariably have an amazing fight stopping (and run provoking) effect by the time we are out of the car. Most of the time the uniform does have an effect and will stop the majority of street type fights.

Domestic violence jobs are by far the most dangerous. More often than not, there is very little information to go by and the fact that it is the first call to the address can mean absolutely nothing in terms of what has and is going on behind the door. Two colleagues had a nightmare experience at one a few years back- one got knocked out and the other only saved herself from asphyxiation by managing to wrestle an arm free and squeezing and twisting his balls with every ounce of strength she had. (I have yet to see this technique in the Home Office Approved Restraints manual)

In short, there are very few situations we know we are going to where we know there is going to be violence. I've learned not to try and second guess whats happened at a call because no two are ever the same. I just worry about a) where the call is and b) getting there without stacking it. Then think about what I've got to do with the job when I get there.

The exception though is the emergency activation button when an officer presses their little red button. This invariably means "I need help now" and anyone who has access to a car with a fleet number will be on their toes.

But what goes through my head? Well, actually pretty much the same thing. Where do I go, and don't crash. The only difference now is I have no mechanical sympathy for the car and rag seven bells of hell out of it to get there. I'm mature enough (!!!!!!!!!) to not feel the need to drive like a tool to every call whether shoplifter or domestic- but I leave the minimum in reserve for the urgent assistance shout. The adrenaline tends to get going on this kind of call too, especially depending on what the officer in trouble manages to transmit across the radio, and there is a definite buildup of tension as you get nearer the scene. I can best equate it to the build up to kickoff in a rugby match- you know its about to get physical and you may well get bashed around but if you're going to be any use you keep your head and chose your moves carefully.

Right... that will do. Tis now well past my bedtime and I shall suffer if I don't get moving. PCSO Bloggs, I hope this has been of use!

Gathering dust

Evening all.

Apologies for the continual lack of updates here. Unfortunately at the moment blogging is somewhat on the back seat. I'm not under any pressure from anyone to stop, I don't have senior management asking awkward questions, nor am I getting any funny looks from my Pc's.

Well, none more than usual, anyway.

Personal circumstances at the moment mean I just don't simply have the time to put a proper effort into this and I don't like doing a half-arsed job on things. Maybe one day, (if the senior management finally relent and change this frankly terrible shift pattern we're currently burdened with) I'll find myself with more time and will get motivated to starting shouting out again from this corner of blogdom.

In the meantime I'm currently looking to get off response team. I've said that before but this time I actually am. I've been doing it for several years now and I need a break from all the politics and scrutinisation to the nth degree. I'm just coasting at the moment, not really wanting to get stuck into anything.

I'll come back, I know I will. Uniform response work is all I ever joined to do and despite the opinions of practically everyone else in the job, everything else plays second fiddle to the boys and girls taking the 999 calls. If you lost one office based department or other there'd be varying degrees of hassle and whinging but should the 999 team collectively decide to call it a half day and clear off down the pub it'd be total chaos.

I'm looking at a number of things- going into one of the specialised uniform units like traffic (should they still exist, as unpopular as they are) or armed response (if the wife will let me). I may go back to old grounds if a position pops up in the street duties unit. I did enjoy that when I last ran it- still out and about, but with a lot more flexibility. I wrote the shift pattern for the troops when I last ran it and yes I made damn sure there were weekend night shifts in there. I don't get it when street duty units do 10 weeks of early turns. Pointless.

Got to admit tho I am somewhat of a closet rat (job parlance for traffic officers) and there's where I'd go if I had the choice. I've even starting nosing around neighbouring forces to see if they've got any positions going.

So we'll see what happens. I'm not going to be fussy and whatever comes up first I'll apply for.

So, in the meantime, if anyone is still reading, thanks for the patience. I'll be back one day.

Politics Racing

Well it's all going a bit wrong down in the fine capital of this island. Blair out, Ghaffur on gardening leave, Dizaei suspended and the NBPA taking out adverts in the press saying don't go anywhere near the Met.

I don't know if I work in a bubble or what but the environment the NBPA talk about is one I don't recognise. No-one is forced to sit on a different table. Either I'm blind to it but I can honestly say I've never seen any overt racism in my job. Ever.

My force has a policy, as do most forces across the country, of positive discrimination. What this means in essence is that persons of a certain skin colour are given extra help and training to achieve promotion and selection for specialist roles. Could you imagine the outcry if this skin colour selected was white? I can understand the reasons for it, but to tackle discrimination with discrimination is a dead end road.

Every black (or VEM, as my force brackets those eligible for said extra help- visible ethnic minority) officer I know has refused to accept the help from the "positive discrimination" unit. I can clearly recall a time in training school when this positive whatnot team introduced themselves. One girl clarified she was eligible for this extra help by basis of one of her parents being of a particular foreign origin. I can remember her storming out of the room in disgust that she was eligible for help solely on the basis of her parents origin. One I know refused to join the NBPA and then found himself ostracised by his colleagues who did join. How messed up is that?

An asian colleague tells a story of when he was at a diversity seminar. The trainer asked everyone to give an account when they suffered discrimination as a result of their skin colour. He thought, and he realised he couldn't think of one. The trainer refused to believe him, and when he stuck to his ground she put in a racially aggravated complaint against him. I kid you not.

I'm not saying the police is perfect. Perhaps I'm lucky that I joined recently enough so that the racism of old (or not so old, by the tales of the 80's I hear) has gone. I would be an idiot to think that we're doing fine. My asian colleague above I would assume would be the exception to the rule, and there does remain the issues that we predominantly don't represent the communities we represent. Thats one of the few things I do agree with Boris Johnson about, although I would point out to him that how about he considers the ethnic proportionalities of parliament too.

But I don't think it's as bad as the NBPA would for some reason have us believe.

In the meantime, if all else fails I'll can the job, get busy with the wife and move to Ealing.

Motorway Cops

You know, I like to think I generally try and keep (for when I get the time to post!! ha) things topical and serious on here. There's a still unpublished musing on the whole Mark Saunders affair loitering in the draft posts section- just what is up with the Independent On Sunday?- and I'm sorry but I think this whole Tarique Ghaffur shambles rumbling on in the big smoke is little more than grown ups acting juvenile and throwing their toys out of the pram, with this whole racism malarkey as a smokescreen. I hope I'm right, but won't gain any pleasure at all to be proved so.

But I've just watched Motorway Cops on the beeb and thought nah balls to high brow blogging lets be populist! Poor wifey has retired early to bed suffering with this cold that everyone has either had or is closely related to someone who has had it (it was my turn last week)- so I've got a bit of time to spare.

So just what were those two Danish girls on? Must have been cocaine if you ask me, to be that plain barking bonkers and aggressive on the carriageway (I've got to admit, I did not see that coming) to relatively normal in custody. Heh I did sympathise with the custody skipper asking the standard issue question of "Have you ever tried to harm yourself" with the mumbled afterthought of "apart from running into moving motorways (twice)!"

What got me though was those two illegal immigrants picked up off the motorway. What kind of ridiculous policy is not arrest them but just send them off to the immigration centre? I acknowledge that should they be arrested, immigration officers would do exactly the same thing of taking no further action, and would simply tell them to attend a walk-in immigration centre. However, entering the country illegally is a criminal offence which means that if they are arrested and sent off toHome Office centres from custody we can get their fingerprints and DNA first. This would help catch out in future the odd one or two who come here with less than honest intentions- and get a concrete date for when they were in the country!

Those two who walked off happy as larry from the two motorway cops, should they ever get stopped again- if they've got any sense at all they'll say they've only just entered the country. That other bloke arrested on the programme had overstayed his visa for 10 years for goodness' sake.

Immigration whinges aside, I would quite like to join traffic and one of these days may get round to making serious enquiries about it. No custody, a decent job car, and the science of accident reconstruction interests me. It's really rather frustrating traffic departments (I still refuse to call it roads policing) are out of favour with politicians and top cops making my chances of joining their ranks somewhat slimmer.

Treading Water

I know, I know. No updates for weeks on end.

I'd like to put some funny or humorous slant on it, but there isn't one really. I am fed up with the job to the extent that time away from it I don't want to think about it at all. I am actively searching the jobs pages (internal, I might add, it's not that bad) for something else- I feel at the moment I simply have to get off response team.

I can't pinpoint precisely why, but its a combination of a few things. A new performance target obsessed governor certainly doesn't help. If it doesn't tick one of his boxes, he simply doesn't care. Actually, that's not true- he actively discourages the troops to do anything that doesn't contribute. Unlucky for you, Suburbiaville residents, if you have a road accident, have a relative who dies, or have cause to call police for anything other than an incident that will require you or someone to be arrested or searched. I don't agree with it all, my PC's know I don't agree with it. They know as long as they're doing their jobs properly I don't care what the final outcome is. But when it's the governor who signs off their applications for courses or promotion, he only looks at the league tables, so I can't blame them for playing the game.

Shift pattern- at least every other month I don't have any weekends off at all. Football season will probably put paid to the other 1 in 4 weekends I'm not at work soon enough.

I think the thing that saddens me most of all is that I am seriously fed up with the laziness of some of the PC's across the teams. I have put a lot of effort into trying to help out with their kit, sorting out supplies, making sure everything is there available that needs to go with a response crew. Yet I go away for a week and find everything in complete disarray. With a few exceptions, the PC's are selfish and either keep stuff for themselves, or expect everything to be sorted out for them. For them, it seems, everything is always someone elses job- yet actually they all have the collective responsibility for it. I've even had some of them come up to me and say "but this isn't your job sarge!" to which I've replied "I know, it's yours". However, the message still hasn't got through and I've had enough doing it for them. Especially when really in theory I should be disciplining them for not doing it in the first place.

So, I'm actively seeking to get off response work. Perhaps I just need a break from it, a change is as good as a holiday and all that. I'm not that fussy as to where I go, just as long as its not office based!

So apologies for the lack of effort on here. I take my hat off to the other bloggers who get almost daily updates on theirs. Hopefully, in a few months, I'll be doing something different and getting myself a bit more zested up. Not just - to quote Mrs Simon who happened to read this whilst in progress- "all you're doing is moaning!"